Spark and Sergio are screaming.  Morrissey’s words.  “Sister I’m a Poet” crackling through the car’s broken speakers.

“And is evil just something you are?  Or something you do?”

A puff of black exhaust exploding into the October sunset.  Sergio’s boot pressed against the floor.  Clove cigarettes lit.  Through the smokey air, the twinkling towers of downtown Denver inching closer.

“Did you bring it?”

“And nothing else.”

She smiles.

Pulling her black trench coat open.

Skin.

A purple satin bikini.

Sergio swerves.  Recovers.  Laughs.

“Pervert.  Where the hell are you taking me?”

“Somewhere.  You will.  Need that.”

+++

The underground parking garage reeks.  Urine and gasoline.  Sergio walks around to her side, opens the door and extends a hand.

“So far, so romantic, romeo.”

His lips on her forehead.  Hands around her waist.  Whispering.

“Be nice.  The bikini.  Car wash people.  Will see you now.”

She rolls her eyes.  Pulse quickening.  Skin flushing.

In the elevator, two tongues twisting together beneath fluorescent light.  Their destination revealed.  A tarnished bronze sign near the door.

“WELCOME TO THE ADAM’S MARK HOTEL”

“Oh my, Sir Sergio.  A hotel?  Are you planning to take advantage of me?”

“Well..”

“You better be.”

Sergio had some strange rules.  One of them he called “The Last Nine Blind.”  If he planned a date for them, she couldn’t see where they were going.  For the last nine minutes, or last nine miles, of the trip.  A red satin blindfold helped keep her honest.  At first, it made her nervous.  Now, it made her horny.  The car wasn’t the only place the blindfold came in handy.

Ascending quickly.  One button lit on the elevator panel.  “Roof Level - Exercise Room”.

Doors opening to a long, silent hall.  At the end, a door. Locked.  Sergio trying again.  Jiggling the handle furiously.

“Um, perhaps the hotel facilities are reserved for.. hotel guests?”

His tongue shoots out.  Pointing at her.

“This.  Isn’t.  Over.”

Walking towards the other end of the corridor, a door ajar.  Someone speaking Spanish.  Sergio knocks.

“Yes sir, yes sir?  Can may I help you?”

“I forgot my room key.  Can you let us in?  It’s our anniversary.”

A smile cracking across the wrinkled, sweet face of the housekeeper.

“Si, si, yes.”

As the door swings open, Spark’s heart bounces.

Before them, the serene shimmer of the rooftop pool.  Steam wafting slowly from its surface.  The entire city sparkling into view beyond.

Trench coats falling to the pavement.  Bodies slowly submerged.  Fingers finding targets.  Hips finding hips.  A roman candle of orgasms exploding into the night sky.

“I could die right now, and I’d be just fine.”

+++

The ride home, quiet.  U2 playing softly.  Achtung Baby.  Spark’s head nestled against Sergio’s shoulder.  Ditching the car a block and half out, as usual.  He’s walking her home.  Making sure she gets there safe.  It’s seventeen past midnight.  The sleepy suburb snores.  Up ahead, something on the sidewalk.  Something glowing.

A jack-o-lantern.

Resting at the end of the Reidmuller’s old driveway.  They’d been gone for months.  A rusting FOR SALE sign dangling in the yard, squeaking in the crisp breeze.

“Ten points if you hit a bird…”

A true Sergio smile spreading across his pale face at the inside joke.  He loved being quoted by her.  He loved being quoted by anyone.

A running start.

Dr. Martins crushing leaves.

Sergio just a blur in the distance.  And then.  Whack.  His kick sends the pumpkin flying towards the house.  Towards a waist high pile of leaves.  The candle was still burning.  As the lid opens, it tumbles out.  Into the pile.

The fire is like a flash bulb of heat.  Instantaneous and blinding.  It’s everywhere.  Climbing up the rotted vines circling the house.  Into the patchy lawn.  Everything is burning.  The smell of smoke.  Sergio staring in disbelief.  Spark standing in awe.  Admiring the flames.

Losing his composure for the first time since she’s known him, Sergio speaks.

“Run, fucking run.”

this post is part of a series.  read part 1 here

indifference is stronger than trust.

indifference is safer than love.

-cash

I must say I’m rather impressed.  With TGOC.  No big surprise there.  This time though, it’s something special.  A couple of weeks ago I installed analytics on the site.  What an eye opener.  I knew I was reaching thousands of people every month, which is a good start.  I’ve always had avid supporters stateside, with a lot of TGOC love on the west coast, Colorado and NYC.  The Gospel’s getting bigger every day.

What I didn’t know was just how global I’d gone.

To all my friends, readers, and followers in:

Argentina

Brazil

France

Greece

Hong Kong

India

Kenya

New Zealand

Romania

Singapore

United Kingdom

and especially… Iraq (!)

Thank you for visiting.  Reading.  Supporting my work.

You’re the reason I’m here.

I’ll do everything I can to keep you coming back.

hugs,
cash

People suck.  At what?  Relationships.  People suck 13 times worse at something else.  Break ups.  Whether you’re on the giving or receiving end of the final farewell, it takes its emotional toll.  Big time.  How long you choose to suffer though, is entirely up to you.  I’ve known people whose lives were still poisoned by a sinister separation years after the fact.  Lucky for you?  I’m here to help.  Soothe the pain.  Right the wrong.  Cauterize the wound.  In typical Cash form; a trio.  My most tremendous trio yet.  The three R’s.

If you’re smart enough?  Big enough? Sane enough to listen up?  You’ll save yourself a lot of pain.

THE THREE R’S OF A HEALTHY BREAK-UP

1)  REVERIE

The first thing you need to do?  Reflect on all the good things that ever happened in the relationship.  You heard me.  I’m not talking highlights here.

I’m talking every.  Single.  Blessing.

Every sparks-flying-kiss.  Bed rattling orgasm.  Thoughtful card received.  Kind words spoken.  Romantic rendezvous enjoyed.  Every Saturday afternoon chilling in bed to a soothing soundtrack.  Every rowdy road trip.  Picnic in the park.  Every single thing you bragged to your girlfriends about.  Every awesome story that left the guys’ with jaws dropped at your good luck.

Every.  Single.  Blessing.

Take your time.  It may take hours.  Days.  Weeks.  Don’t rush it.  It’s the most important part.

Why the hell would you do that?

Shut up jackass, I’m getting there.

You’re doing this because you need to make peace with the fact that regardless of how it ended, the relationship itself was a gift, not a curse.  Skipping this step is misery guaranteed.  Subconsciously at the very least?  You’ll wonder if the whole thing was a waste of time.

Let me tell you something important.

Time spent pursuing something beautiful is never wasted, no matter the outcome.

You need to accept this as it flows from present to past tense.  As its lessons build.  As its darkness fades.  And oh, it will fade.  But only if you let it, by remembering it for what it was;  gorgeous.  For a time at least.  A moment.  A week.  A year.

Most people think the first step in getting over someone is to remember all the shitty things they did.  Most people are fucking idiots.  Doing this only insures the bile, ill will and anger builds.

Anger and ill will directed towards anyone, at anytime?  Is anger and ill will towards yourself.

After all, you’re the one who pays the emotional, stomach turning price every-time you think back on where it went wrong.  What he or she did, or didn’t do.  No thanks.  Find reverie in the good, and you’re on your way to overcoming the bad.

2)  REMEMBRANCE

Even in the most wonderful, loving, well intentioned relationships on earth?  There’s compromise.  Things you give up.  In most cases, these things are bigger than you think.  People you can’t see as much.  Things you no longer do.  Pieces of yourself you move to the back burner to be a better fit for your amore.  Remembrance is the process of realizing what these things are, and bringing them back.  Embracing them.  Taking solace in the fact your freedom is restored.  Hopefully with an eye on maintaining it throughout the relationship next time around.

3)  RESPECT

“Respect” can be defined in one simple phrase:

Take the highest road possible.

I’m not talking drugs here (for once!).  I’m talking about how you behave.  Be the biggest person you possibly can.  This is no time for revenge.  Getting even.  Settling some subconscious score with the hopes it will make things easier on you.  It won’t.

Bad Karma pays off triple following a break up.

Why?

You never know what the other person is going through.  How hard it may be on them.  The hell losing you has become.  The only way to make peace with yourself?  Is to make peace with them.  Be good.  Civil.  Kind.  Even if it’s the hardest thing you’ve ever done.  It will be the hardest thing you’ve ever done.  The positive energy this none-too-simple act creates?  Benefits you so much now, and even more later, when the tables are turned.  Someday, they will be.

Breaking up can be like surviving a death in the family.  Don’t let it be yours.  Have reverie for the good that came of it, remember what you lost in the process, and respect the person you shared something special with.

If they’ve got a brain, a soul, and a heart?

They’re doing the same thing.

Of all the brilliant quotes in Chuck Palahniuk’s seminal “Fight Club” I’m proud to apply to my own life?  There’s one I honestly wish I couldn’t:

Tyler Durden: Where’d you go, psycho boy?

Narrator: I felt like destroying something beautiful.

Live and learn my friends.

Live and learn.

I think I’m finally waking up.  Waking up to the notion that the “great outdoors” can actually be, uh, pretty great.  Considering I’ve been wary of sunlight in general and the wilderness specifically for years, it’s a pretty big epiphany. I’ve got my oldest friend in the world, Adam (see here), to thank for helping me see the light.

This past weekend was spent in the pristine woodlands near West Lake, Colorado.  In addition to soaking up some fresh air, clearing my mind and mood and copious amounts of PBR and tequila, we also enjoyed some gourmet fixins around a glorious campfire.  Discovered the joys of hatchet throwing.  Extreme frisbee in the forest.  And, fished.  My first time ever.  Amazingly, under the excellent tutelage of master bass hole Adam, I actually caught one to boot.

Cash’s First Catch

Back in my Urban Monarch days, I wrote a whole post about do’s and dont’s for beginner campers such as myself.

I’m proud to say we nailed pretty much everything on that list (with the exception of bringing mats to sleep on- Adam’s chiropractor, send your bill to the nappy roots beneath our tent).  We also discovered a few new things to keep in mind.

1)  FISHING; PUBLIC HOLES AND PRIVATE PARTS

Having never been to the Red Feather Lakes area of Colorado, I had no idea what to expect, in terms of where we’d be casting our lines.  My vision of the area was lake after lake of prime, open fishing spots.  Well, the “lake after lake” part was right on.  There are more lakes in this 5 mile area than I’ve ever seen in my life.  The only problem?  99% of them are private.  We spent half a day touring around until we finally came upon “West Lake” which was thankfully un crowded and open to the public.

Check online for public lakes before leaving the house, and you can spend more time cursing the one that wiggled away, and less time driving around dirt roads cursing the rain.

2)  A FULL TANK CAN SAVE HALF YOUR SANITY

Fill up, alll the way up, as close to the area you plan to set up camp as possible.  Adam and I almost had a Deliverance-esq disaster when the tank hit “E” what felt like half a million miles from civilization.

3)  WATER WATER EVERYWHERE, JUST SOME OF WHICH TO DRINK

Bring as much bottled water as you can possibly pack.  Thankfully, Adam had a 32 pack of 20oz bottles in the trunk.  Not only a life saver for drinking, but helped with washing up, brushing teeth, and most importantly, putting out a seriously stubborn campfire when it came time to hit the hay.

Cash Life - Still Life Edition

It was a joy to camp, and fish, and throw hatchets with as avid and experienced an outdoorsman as Adam.  The trip was a lifeline for my sanity and spirits.

Adam, I thank you more than you know.

The grand prize of a satisfied existence?  The gold medal?  The standard by which all other accomplishments are judged?  Is an award.  An award you can only give yourself.

How?

Look in the mirror.

If you wouldn’t.  Rather see. Anyone else.  On earth?

It’s yours.

Get to work.

Time is short.

TGOC is here to help.

My choice for most consistently awesome director ever?  Darren Aronofsky.  His filmography reads like a who’s who of Cash’s all time favorites:

1.  Requiem For a Dream
2.  The Wrestler
3.  Pi
4.  The Fountain

Add to this list the upcoming “Black Swan”.

A New York City ballet company is producing Swan Lake, and director Thomas Leroy (Cassel) decides to replace prima ballerina Beth MacIntyre (Ryder) with ballerina Nina (Portman). Nina lives with Erica (Hershey), her overbearing mother and a former ballerina. Nina finds competition in new dancer Lily (Kunis). Swan Lake requires a ballerina who can play the innocent White Swan, which fits Nina, and the sensual Black Swan, which fits Lily. The dancers’ rivalry changes into a bizarre friendship, and Nina begins exploring a dark side of herself.

Natalie Portman has never done much for me (let the hate mail begin, Comic Con weirdos) but Mila Kunis is as much fun to watch on the big screen as she is to play blackjack with.  Yes, I’d know.

The trailer is unnerving.  Hinting at a dark descent into madness and duality, it’s scary, sinister, and sexy in equal doses.

Cash’s fingers crossed on this one.

Black Swan - Trailer
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Digital Photo
Stencil on Sidewalk
17th and Market
8.20.2010

This Saturday night, celebrate the birth of a living legend.  Ms Easy. Denver’s own agent provocateur , world famous go-go dancer, and all around ‘it girl’.  Just back from Paris, she’s sure to shock the house with an unbelievable performance.  MC Flipside is playing a special set, just for her, and Beta Nightclub ( the #1 club in America) becomes wonderland in honor of our favorite neon pink haired Alice.

Be there, or off with your heads!